Sunday Night Rocket Fuel Healthy Kale Soup

The wind is howling outside and we are slap bang in the middle of winter. You probably have a cold, are about to get one or have just fought off the last one. Either that or you have drunk yourself stupid over the last weekend because there is nothing else to do in this cold shitty winter of ours. Well rather than being miserable and feeling sorry for yourself I've come up with this epic soup that is full of goodness and like a meal in a bowl. Give this a lash and watch just how good you feel nearly instantly.

Instructions

Step 1

The ingredients are easy enough to find and this is a cheap as fuck soup. You'll make enough for a family or for a few days for yourself

Step 2

Grab the onions.

Step 3

Peel the bastards. If you can't complete this step then just give up now!

Step 4

Chop them up roughly.

Step 5

Peel the garlic.

Step 6

Chop the shit out of it

Step 7

Grab the fresh thyme. Don't even think about using the dry stuff because it tastes like sawdust. Fresh is essential

Step 8

Pick all the leaves away from the stalks.

Step 9

Peel the ginger. Use a little knob (hehe) of it as you don't want to overpower the whole soup.

Step 10

Chop it up roughly. Thats all the prep done and the base flavours ready.

Step 11

Lash a bit of olive oil into a large pot. The biggest one you have.

Step 12

Lash all the ingredients that you prepped into the pot. Cook them over a really low heat while you prep the rest of the stuff. Stir them every so often

Step 13

Prep the kale by washing it and removing the big thick stalks because they are bitter and taste like ass

Step 14

Your kale should look like this when prepped.

Step 15

Grab the spuds. 4 nice big ones.

Step 16

Peel and chop the bastards up into even sized pieces.

Step 17

Lash the potatoes into the pot when all the ingredients are nice and soft. Turn the heat up a little to a medium heat.

Step 18

The kale will probably take up the whole pot but don't worry it'll shrink.

Step 19

Keep stirring it the whole time.

Step 20

Once the kale has decreased in size fuck in the cabbage. Make sure to buy pre-chopped shit so as you don't have to do any extra work.

Step 21

Keep it all stirred the whole time over the medium heat for about 2-3 minutes

Step 22

Cover it all in water. Lash in a couple of stock cubes as well (I forgot to take a picture of the stock cubes but you know what they fucking look like so stop complaining)

Step 23

Turn it down to a low to medium heat and pour yourself a glass of wine or go have a shower. It'll take about 30 minutes to simmer properly and let everything soften up

Step 24

When the potatoes are soft and starting to fall apart you are good to go.

Step 25

Blitz the shit of it all in either a blender or with a hand gun.

Step 26

After seasoning it up with some salt and pepper and make sure it is super smooth

Step 27

Serve it up and feel that goodness soaking down into your body!

Soups don't really get much better for you than this. All the cool kids are eating kale again and cabbage is about as much of a super food as you are ever likely to eat. Forget about the fear from drinking too much or catching another cold because if you lash this together all will quickly be right with the world again. Fucking gorgeous.